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Welcome to Refinery29’s Why I Do It, a series where we ask inspirational, successful people 29 questions about what fuels them on and off the clock. Because, let’s face it: life is about so much more than chasing inbox zero.

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Crystal Dunn is a legend on the soccer field. She’s been on the U.S. Women’s National Team since 2013, making 132 appearances (and counting). Her now decade-long professional career has been decorated with highlights, from being the first overall pick in the 2014 College Draft of the National Women’s Soccer League to playing for both the 2016 and 2020 Olympic teams. She is also a mother, and gave birth to her 13-month-old son in May 2021. Here’s why she does it.

What’s the very first thing you do when you wake up? The very first thing I do is take care of my 13-month-old son, make sure that he is waking up to a bright new day, feed him, change him, and spend quality time with him in the morning.

What’s the last thing you do before you go to bed? It’s kind of similar. I give him a nice little bottle, I tuck him in. I enjoy the time that you put the baby down at night. It gives you that moment of peace where you can kind of be like, Alright, another day done, good job, pat yourself on the back. Usually it’s me and my husband just having tea on the couch and hanging out.

Power nap or power workout? Power nap.

Early bird or night owl? Night owl.

How many unread emails do you have in your inbox right now? Oh gosh, putting me on blast. I have close to 1,000.

Iced coffee or hot coffee? Iced coffee.

What’s your favorite thing that you keep on your desk or work space? I keep my planner close by, making sure I know where I need to be and what I need to do.

When was the last time you felt like a success? Probably giving birth to my son — that was a massive success moment. I would say I’ve had some success since then, but I think that was a massive, massive moment, becoming a mom.

What do you do on those days when you don’t feel that confident? I journal a lot. Jotting my worries and concerns down allows me to acknowledge them and embrace them and show that it’s okay to have moments like that.

What’s one thing you do every day, without fail? Listen to music. When the day starts I gotta put on some tunes to get going. I listen to a lot of Afro beats.

What’s something you wish you did every day? I wish I had time in the day to have a quick getaway, like a day trip somewhere. That’s something I always would love to have time for.

What’s your favorite piece of advice that you’ve gotten? Don’t be afraid to fail. I think in giving yourself that green light to take risks allows me to be like, I’m not afraid to miss this pass or have an off moment. That means that I’m growing and getting better and I’m trying to live outside of my comfort zone. Not being afraid to fail is a massive piece of advice that I think I live by every day.

What’s your least favorite piece of advice that you’ve gotten? Any advice around being patient is always great advice, but you’re always like, No, I want what I want now and I don’t want to wait. Whenever someone is like be patient, I’m like, I want it now, though.

Who inspires you the most? I’m inspired by many different people for different aspects of my life. Being on a team, I’m very inspired by my teammates. I spend more time with them than my own family most of the time. Being around people that get our lifestyle is really inspiring because it allows you to be vulnerable and be able to express how you’re feeling because these are people that are going through similar things, like the grind of training, grind of traveling, all those things I think my teammates get, so it’s very easy to like lean on and be inspired by them.

Who, if anyone, do you try to emulate? I don’t know if I have a set answer. I find a lot of great qualities in a lot of people, but I always try to stay true to me because it’s really hard to look at someone else’s life and think, I want what they have. I always try to be grateful for what I have and be inspired by me wanting to grow and get better as a person every day.

What’s something people ask you for advice about often? Now that I’m a veteran on the U.S. Women’s National Team a lot of young players ask me things that are tactically related, which is great. They look up to me in a way where they’re like, you’ve been on the team long enough, where should I be in this play at this moment? A lot of people ask me certain tactics about soccer, which I always hope that I can give them good advice and good information to help them grow as a better player.

What’s a piece of advice you felt proud to give? I find myself speaking to the young [players] mostly about enjoying the journey and what it entails. There are great moments and not so great moments, and I don’t think you get better without falling down a couple of times and getting back up. You never know what the future holds and you want to stay as present as possible.

What is your most-used app on your phone? I’m not a massive app person, but I would probably say Instagram.

Where do you put your phone while you’re sleeping? I put my phone on Do Not Disturb, but it is by my bedside.

What do you do when you feel yourself burning out? Moments where I feel a little bit overwhelmed, I carve out time in the day to journal a bit. Sometimes I like to call a friend and chat with them, not even to talk about about me but just checking in with my friends. I can step outside myself and connect with others about what else is going on in the world. Sometimes it’s good to change gears and check in with a friend I haven’t talked to in a while and see what’s going on with them.

What’s something you consider a secret weapon? I guess it’s not a secret, but I think being a mom has given me this whole new perspective in life that I feel like I wouldn’t have experienced. I think it’s made me a better person, a better player, a better wife. It’s allowed me to step into a role that I get to make my own and also just carry that new perspective into every aspect of my life.

Where are you, compared to where you thought you’d be at 12 years old? At 12 years old, I still didn’t really know what soccer looked like for me. Looking back on my journey, I think I surpassed where I probably thought I would be. That’s not to say that I didn’t truly believe that I could make it here, I just think as a kid I never knew where soccer could take me. It was always about playing in that tournament that year and then making the next team the next year. I’m 31 years old now. Here I am, still kicking the ball around, so I think I surpassed where I thought I would be. I’m truly blessed to have stayed in the game long enough to be here and enjoy it.

If you could change one thing about your professional life, what would it be? Not live in the doubtful moments for too long. There were times that I was really young and I was really hard on myself and it probably didn’t help me be better in that next moment. I was so hung up on that missed pass or missed shot or whatever it was. When I was younger, I probably hung my head a bit longer than I should have. Now looking back I’m, like, yeah, I should have been a little bit easier on myself back then.

What’s been your biggest pieces of support, helping you get where you are? My parents, my brother, my husband, my close friends that hear all the crazy stories. They’re there for the ride. And now my son, so I have a great support system. I lean on different people for different things, but I think it’s important to have your village and your people that help you get through.

What do you do to start your workday? Definitely have a cup of coffee, that is an absolute must. And then depending on my setting, making sure I know exactly what the day looks like is something that gives me peace to tackle the day.

What do you do to end your workday? I love chamomile tea, so my way to close out the day is taking a cup of tea to the couch and sitting and decompressing and getting ready for the night.

What’s the last song you listened to? I ended my night with the same kind of music that I start the day with, a little bit of my chill Afro beats.

What’s the last photo in your favorites folder on your phone? It’s my son taking a nap. I always get so happy when he’s napping — everyone knows that that’s also my time to rest.

If you could go back and do one thing differently in your career path, what would it be? When I was starting out, I didn’t have a clear idea of what my brand was going to be or who I was going to be outside of soccer. I think I was so focused on being the best soccer player I could be that I don’t know if I put the most focus into Crystal Dunn, the person. I would have started branding myself way earlier, I would have put together a better team that was going to market me the way I wanted to be marketed and really tap into who Crystal Dunn is off the field.

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