Between making sure everyone is clothed, fed and happy and that the bills are paid and the house is clean, mothers do it all, all day long. One mom’s TikTok video perfectly sums up how it feels to have no time for fun because you’re too busy taking care of a thousand things.
Libby Ward, the creator behind the TikTok page, “Diary of an Honest Mom,” shared a video on the mental load of motherhood that went viral because moms everywhere can relate all too well.
The video features Ward performing a robotic chicken dance. She sings, “One thing about me is that when I was growing up, I was a really fun person to be around. And so I got married to my husband young, and we did so many fun things and it was so great, but then we decided to have some children.”
“And I love them very much but I was really overwhelmed because no one told me that you have to keep thinking literally all day and all night, and anticipating everybody’s every single need, and deciding when to feed everyone and what to feed them and where they go, and…paying bills and doing all the things in my brain that you can’t see,” she continues.
Ward is a mother of two from Ontario, Canada and she nails it so perfectly. There’s only so much real estate in your brain and if ever square inch of space is spent on taking care of every body else’s needs, how could you possibly have time for fun? With research to support the negative effects of unpaid labor on women’s mental health, it’s past time to acknowledge and make changes. So, if motherhood makes you less fun it might be because you’re too busy feeling exhausted.
“And that made me so much less fun than I was before. And then I was resentful and jealous of my husband because he was still able to be so fun. And so I talk about this, because I know I’m not the only one,” Ward ends.
This video resonated with so many moms and the thousands of comments prove it.
“Wow. I know this is comical but you broke it down in a way that makes so much sense. i’m so overwhelmed. Thanks for letting me know it’s OK. ”
“Husband asks why I always look stressed out on vacations. Because I had to plan & remember everything and you keep asking me what we are doing next!”
“it’s not just the housework it’s the COGNITIVE WORK!”
“Omg yes!!! This totally breaks it down and makes so much sense. Thank you for being so relatable ”
“I really wish more people would acknowledge The Mental Load, it’s not just doing chores and cooking, it’s emotionally and mentally taxing as hell”
Ward also spoke to Good Morning America about her video. “My mission is to really open up hard conversations that aren’t being heard about motherhood so that I can inspire change in the hearts of mothers and the homes across Canada and the U.S. so that women can feel more balanced and prioritize themselves.”
Her videos empower mothers in different ways, from relatable motherhood truths to jumping on funny trends. “By taking care of your own needs, you can be the parent you want to be,” Ward said. “You are worth taking care of and by doing that, you’re gonna be better able to show up for your kids in the way that you want to show up.”