Shame Has Changed Sides: Gisèle Pelicot’s Bravery Will Impact All Our Lives

Warning: This article contains descriptions of or allusions to rape, sexual abuse and gaslighting.

We all have a Gisèle Pelicot in our life. She’s the woman in our local bakery we sometimes smile at, even say hello to. 

Like Gisèle, we all have firefighters, nurses and delivery drivers in our life too. Like Gisèle, we rely on firefighters, nurses and delivery drivers to make our life easier, better. Like Gisèle, we never expect these seemingly ordinary, everyday men to abuse, assault or rape us. Like Gisèle, we never expect our seemingly trustworthy husband of 50 years to deliberately facilitate abuse, assault or rape us with them.

On September 2, 2024, Gisèle Pelicot took her now ex-husband Dominique Pelicot, then 71, and these 50 men, these neighbours and acquaintances, to court. On December 19, 2024, after 16 weeks at trial, a panel of five judges found all 51 men guilty: 46 of them guilty of rape, two guilty of attempted rape and two guilty of sexual assault of Gisèle. Dominique Pelicot was found guilty of all charges against him, including aggravated rape and drugging his then wife. He was sentenced to 20 years in prison, the maximum possible under French law. 

Gisèle, a 72-year-old grandmother from France, waived her right to anonymity in order for the trial to be held in public. The decision was fully supported by her three adult children. 

“It is with profound emotion that I am here, the trial was a very difficult ordeal,” Gisèle said, reading from a statement outside the court in Avignon in the south of France. She spoke of her children and grandchildren: “Because they are the future, it is also for them that I took on this battle.”

It’s a battle in which Gisèle has fought with immense bravery. Throughout her battle — the largest mass rape trial in modern French history — she has repeatedly said: “Shame must change sides.” As we all know, all too often the blame falls upon the rape victim, not the perpetrator.

It is a sentence we will repeat forevermore. When we reply to a ‘joking’ man in a bar. Shame must change sides. When we are asked what we were wearing when the assault happened. Shame must change sides. When someone asks why she was walking home alone at night. In the prosecutors’ summing-up speeches, in the content creators’ captions, typed in online comments and held high on protest banners. We will speak together. Shame must change sides.

“I’m also thinking of the many victims who are not recognised, whose stories often remain in the shadows. I want you to know that we share the same battle,” she continued, sharing that her thoughts were also with the other families affected by the case. 

The case began in November 2020 when the police — who Gisèle says “saved my life” — began investigating Dominique Pelicot after a security guard caught him filming up women’s skirts in a grocery store. Between 2011 and 2020, Dominique drugged Gisèle by crushing sleeping tablets into her meals at their home without her knowledge. This led to her having difficulty remembering things and concentrating. Through an online chatroom, Dominique then enlisted men to rape and sexually abuse her while she lay in an unconscious state. He filmed it, and stored the recordings on a USB drive, in a file labelled “abuses.” It contained 20,000 images and films of Gisèle being raped almost 100 times.

These 50 men who carried out the abuse were aged between 26 and 73 at the time of their arrests. The number may even be 80 as police have been unable to identify 30 other men who appear in Dominique’s recordings.   

“When I opened the doors to this trial on 2 September, I wanted society to be able to take part in this debate. I have never regretted that decision,” Gisèle continued outside court. “I have confidence in our ability to collectively grasp a future in which everyone, women and men alike, can live in harmony, with mutual respect and understanding.”

Thanks to Gisèle, we have all taken part in this debate. But let’s be clear: Dominique Pelicot is not the “Monster of Avignon.” All 50 men found guilty (and the 30 still unidentified) are not the “Monsters of Avignon.” They’re firefighters, nurses and delivery drivers we rely on to make our lives easier, better. They all had Gisèle Pelicot in their lives. They saw her in their local bakery, they smiled at her, even said hello to her. Not one of these ordinary, everyday men tried to help her. 

But Gisèle Pelicot has helped us. And now we’ll help in collectively grasping a future where shame has changed sides.  

Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?

When A Student Is Raped, Who Do Schools Protect?

The Horrifying World Of Reform School Abuse

This article was originally published on refinery29.com.