Picture the perfect Valentine’s Day: You’re walking along the Seine with a chocolate hazelnut crepe in one hand and your partner’s hand in the other. Just ahead, the Eiffel Tower twinkles against the inky night sky, illuminating your face in romantic lighting. Unable to resist, you lean in for a passionate kiss, body igniting into sparks of desire, pulses quickening and blood heating as your hands start to — okay, I’ll stop there, since flying to Paris for a super romantic Valentine’s Day seems highly unlikely. But what if you could bring that French ambiance into your bedroom for the sexiest holiday of the year? If you’re nodding oui-oui, it’s time to say “bonjour” to the L’Ultimate Lovers Kit from Frenchie.
If you’re a Francophile not yet familiar with Frenchie, you’re in for a treat. Though the brand, which launched in 2020, is actually Australia-based, each of its products is imbued with France’s legendary sex symbol status. Everything from its signature vibrator (a double-ended clit and G-spot stimulator aptly named The Double Entendre) to Beret Condoms (because what are condoms if not stylish hats?) take inspiration from the City of Love, making them a fun and surprisingly adventurous addition to your sexy times. And it makes the perfect activity for a Valentine’s Day date in.
The Lovers Kit has everything you could possibly need for a sexy rendezvous, either alone or with a paramour. I got my own kit to review and was thrilled to explore the box of goodies one by one, imagining the kind of sexy, fun-filled night it could lead to. Available in two French-themed colorways (melon or bleu), the box contains elevated staples: a vegan water-based lubricant, which is infused with skin-soothing aloe, lubricated condoms made with ultra-moisturizing hyaluronic acid, and individually wrapped, biodegradable cleansing wipes. But I was most delighted to see some more titillating items as well, making it clear that this Lovers Kit is nowhere near basic. It has an extra je ne sais quoi for the more sexually adventurous.
The Le Masque Silk Play Mask and Lovers Dice Set are a perfect kinky combination to get your evening of pleasure started. I suggest covering your eyes with the 100% pure silk mask (which was just as soft as advertised) and putting your evening into the hands of the dice, which suggest a combination of actions and body parts like — blow ear or kiss thigh, etc. — for a total of 36 possible ways to begin your Valentine’s romp.
The pièce de résistance of the Lovers Kit is Frenchie’s Double Entendre. The dual-ended vibrator is like nothing I’d ever seen before, bending easily in my hands to be used in a seemingly endless number of creative ways. The shockingly flexible vibrator can be folded to simultaneously stimulate your G-spot and clit or used internally on you and a partner, and its malleable shape can be turned into a handle to use on yourself (or have someone else use on you). I should also mention that it’s slim enough to experiment anally with. Plus, the intense motor is deceptively quiet, making it perfect for discreet use.
One reviewer raves, “Its shape, size, and flexibility means that it can hit *that* spot, wherever yours is.” Another reviewer who also enjoyed its multiple uses writes, “I would give it 10 stars if possible[,] it is so versatile and works great with a partner or on your own. The dual-headed motors put it in a league of its own also the fact that you can bend it and it stays in place is amazing. We had a number of other toys that we threw away once we got this one.”
As the brand’s mission statement reads, “Frenchie has been created for a new generation of lovers that echo our belief that sex should be fun, natural, simple and safe for everyone,” which is exactly what this kit embodied. So, whether you’re looking for a sensual night in with your cherie, still looking for a handsome stranger to ask “voulez-vous coucher avec moi,” or you just want to watch Moulin Rouge and spend some alone time with Christian and Satine (or is that just a me thing?), the L’Ultimate Lovers Kit has everything you need. Just say “oui” for your sexiest Valentine’s Day date yet.
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