Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.
Today: a senior data science manager who makes $380,000 per year and who spends some of her money this week on a baby shower gift.
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Occupation: Senior manager, data science
Industry: Tech
Age: 35
Location: Boston
Salary: $380,000 ($210,000 in base salary, the rest is restricted stock units).
Joint income: My boyfriend, J., and I have separate finances but we will pay for each other’s items as needed. The plan is to join finances more when we get married, especially around daily expenses, but still keep some separate accounts, especially since we have separate investment accounts and retirement accounts.
Assets: $154,000 in cash spread out over multiple accounts (part emergency fund/part down payment for when J. and I buy a place together); $15,000 in a CD; $491,000 in investments (includes ETFs like VOO and singular stocks); $229,000 in 401(k); $73,000 in IRAs; $13,000 in HSAs; $160,000 equity out of my $600,000 condo that my parents helped me with the down payment for (I have trouble seeing this as my own money).
Debt: $0
Paycheck amount (2x/month): $4,101 currently but because of how I set up deductions, it’ll increase for the last two months of the year.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: $2,400 mortgage plus HOA. I live alone in a one-bedroom.
Loan payments: $0
Pre-Tax Deductions
401(k): $2,400. I front-load my 401(k) to get the max of my employer match early since my employer does $ match rather than % match.
Healthcare plan: $80. I’m on an EPO plan, which means I only have to pay copay to see in-network doctors.
Post-Tax Deductions
Employee stock purchase program: $3,000
All Other Monthly Expenses
Electric: $60
Xfinity: $69.99
Laser facial membership: $250
Pilates eight-class membership: $215
Gym membership: $50
Charitable giving: $88
SimpliSafe alarm plan: $31.99
Netflix: $15.49
Spotify & Hulu: $11.99
Walmart+: $12.95 (gives me Paramount+; credit from Amex Platinum means this is actually free).
Disney+: $7.99 (credit from Amex Platinum means this is actually free).
Peacock: $7.99 (credit from Amex Platinum means this is actually free).
iCloud+: $2.99
Annual Expenses
American Express Platinum: $695
American Express Gold: $350
Condo insurance: $460
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Oh, absolutely! My parents sent me to the US for high school with the expectation that I would attend college here — not only any college, but a top college. No pressure, right? Adjusting to life in a new country was challenging enough without the added weight of “You better get into a top university.” Luckily, they covered my college tuition, housing, food, and all those random expenses from college, like overpriced textbooks and my daily Starbucks coffee. They did the same for my brother, too. Growing up, they’d dreamed of studying in America but couldn’t do it financially, so they saved their money to make sure we could live the dream instead. I joke that our diplomas are the two supercars they never bought.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s)/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
Growing up, conversations about money with my parents were pretty much nonexistent — unless you count the classic “We can’t afford that” speech. When we first moved to the US, our family ended up living off savings and stretching every penny. We lived in apartments that were more “cozy” than “luxurious,” and I remember sleeping on a mattress on the floor. My wardrobe was pieced together from thrift stores and TJ Maxx. A few years later, my dad returned to our home country to return to his higher paying job, but we kept the frugality. So you can imagine my surprise when I was applying to colleges and stumbled upon the revelation that my parents had saved up enough to cover my college tuition and my brother’s.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
My first job was in IT at my college. I got it so that I could have some spending money. My parents were covering most of my expenses but I felt guilty spending fun money when they were so frugal. I earned a whopping $9 an hour and worked about 15-20 hours a week — enough to cover my food cravings and my newfound obsession with eating out and higher-end makeup.
Did you worry about money growing up?
I was always worried about money growing up! My parents never spent any money so I genuinely thought we were broke. They made sure we were always fed and could go on school trips, but anything beyond that felt like a luxury. I had a little cash for church trips and after-school snacks, but forget about splurging on fun stuff! We had one childhood vacation my entire life — to Niagara Falls. Interestingly, most of my close friends were in the same boat so it felt pretty normal. Our public high school had its fair share of cliques, and you could definitely spot the groups based on how much money students were willing to flaunt. I remember thinking, Wow, it must be nice to spend money on brand-name clothes!
Do you worry about money now?
I don’t really worry about money but I do often wonder if I can keep up the lifestyle I’ve grown fond of. My salary has doubled in the past three years, which is fantastic, but let’s just say my spending habits have also gone up — hello, lifestyle creep! Adding onto that, I do have a bit of healthcare anxiety, especially after going through cancer treatment a few years ago (don’t worry, I’m fine now). I do have to see an expensive specialist every year for follow-ups, which keeps me on my toes. I can’t help but worry about the “what ifs” — like, what if I get too sick to work or need to cover pricey treatments? It’s a balancing act between enjoying life and keeping an eye on the future.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I officially became financially responsible for myself at 22, when I landed my first job out of college and was making a cool $75,000 with a 10% bonus. At the time, it felt like winning the lottery. To save money, I shared a three-bedroom apartment with three other girls — yes, I even shared a room. It was kind of like living in a sitcom! I’ve built my own safety net with my assets, and I owe a big thank you to Reddit for that. I max out my 401(k) and invested in ETFs, and everything I’ve learned about money comes from the wise folks on r/personalfinance. That said, I also know I have my parents to lean on if things get tough. Thanks to my Asian upbringing, our finances are pretty intertwined so if they ever need help, I’m there for them, too.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
Yes, I’ve definitely benefited from my parents’ generosity. They covered my college tuition and helped with the down payment on my condo. During the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, I had a roommate who was not being super careful while I was trying to stay responsible. With the interest rate as low as it was, my parents gave me the funds to move out and buy my own place. They wanted me to build equity instead of just renting. I understand this is very privileged. However, there’s an unspoken expectation in my Asian upbringing that when my parents retire, I’ll be there to support them. They have money for retirement but they’re also relying on me.
12 a.m. — Just got off my Uber from the airport after a work trip. I tipped 15% and got 6% back for being an Uber One member. I can expense this since it’s a work trip. $35 (expensed).
1 a.m. — Wash up and scroll through my phone until I feel sleepy. I decide to check my credit card cashback offers and find a 10% cashback offer for Sephora and $2 back on five MBTA rides. Add both to my card — I know they’ll come in handy.
9 a.m. — Time to start the day! One of my at-home extension lashes falls off, so I end up taking all of them off. A few of my natural lashes come out too, which I’m not thrilled about. I usually wait a week or so before putting on new lashes to let them grow back.
11 a.m. — Walk to my Pilates class. I’ve been doing Pilates-inspired workouts for a few years, and it’s great that the studio is just a short stroll away. As a self-proclaimed lazy girl, there’s no way I could stick to a routine if I had to travel far.
12 p.m. — I have a 15-minute laser facial appointment after my workout. I’ve been doing this for about a year, and while it’s pricey, I’ve noticed real improvements in my skin. I’m getting carded again, and my occasional pimples have disappeared. That said, this will be the first expense to go if I decide to save more. I tip the nurse $10. $10
1. p.m. — My boyfriend, J., makes us a salad for lunch. After a week of work trip food, it’s a refreshing change! The salad is a bit salty, but I’m grateful, so I keep my mouth shut.
4 p.m. — We’re heading to my friend’s birthday party. She has rented out a space and requested contributions to the party fund or donations to the Palestine Children’s Relief Fund. I decide to contribute for J. and me: $52.01 for the donation (thanks to fees) and $50 to my friend. $102.01
8 p.m. — We go to the bar for the birthday party in Brookline, which is accessible by MBTA subway. I tap my card (the one with the cashback) and the single fare is $2.40, plus I’ll get $2 back in credit. The party is great — there’s a nice spread of food and some signature cocktails. $2.40
11:59 p.m. — Call an Uber to head back to J.’s since it’s late and we’ve had a good amount to drink. I use some Uber credits. Collapse into bed when we get back. $12
Daily Total: $126.41
10 a.m. — Wake up later than usual thanks to last night’s drinks — probably five in total, and there might have been some shots involved. J. already brought back breakfast sandwiches and made a pot of coffee. We don’t have shared bank accounts but we take turns paying for things, which works well for us.
12 p.m. — Just scrolling through my phone, dealing with the classic hangover. I’m browsing the Anthropologie wedding sale — who doesn’t love a little retail therapy? J. and I have been talking about engagement lately. He’s been showing me diamond options from a wholesaler, and we plan to work with a small designer on Etsy to source the diamond ourselves. We’ve set a budget of about $2,500 for the ring. I know it’s not the most romantic approach, but I suggested we be frugal and thoughtful. After all, the idea that you have to spend months’ worth of salary on a diamond ring is mostly a marketing ploy!
5 p.m. — We’re invited to dinner at a friend’s place. We walk there, which takes about 50 minutes. Since we’re running late, we don’t bring anything, but I figure it will be fine since we know them pretty well.
10 p.m. — We get home and I sign into Slack (even though it’s the weekend). There was an outage over the weekend, and I start getting work messages and tags. I do my best to help out and then go to bed.
Daily Total: $0
9 a.m. — It’s Monday! A workday! I mainly work from home, but I pop into the office every now and then. I sign on and check last night’s messages. Looks like the West Coast team cracked a few things so I just need to add my part to the analysis.
10 a.m. — Now I’m waiting for my coworker to sign on so we can wrap up the write-up. Normally, I would take charge, but another manager has jumped in and I don’t want to step on his toes. While I wait, I scroll through the Alo Yoga sale to see if I can snag some cute flared leggings. I almost convince myself I need a new pair, but then I realize I really don’t, so I close the tab.
1 p.m. — Just had my one-on-one with my manager. It went…okay. He’s a bit of a lecturer, super nice guy, but working with him can feel like having an overbearing parent. I already have one of those at home, so I could do without it at work!
4 p.m. — I’m running low on toothpaste so I decide to treat myself to a new one. I’ve been doing some research and settle on a fluoride and nano-hydroxyapatite toothpaste. Apparently, it’s more effective at preventing cavities than either ingredient alone. I order it on Amazon for $18.16 with tax. Since I don’t have Prime, it’ll take two weeks to arrive through Subscribe and Save. $18.16
6 p.m. — I walk to dinner with some teammates at a Korean BBQ place. It’s a 40-minute stroll, which counts as my exercise for the day. The Korean BBQ is pretty good, and I would love to come back. The meal costs about $45 per person, but thankfully it’s covered by the company. $45 (expensed).
10 p.m. — I don’t have a set nighttime routine — just whatever feels right. I usually shower and brush my teeth. If I’m feeling motivated, I’ll put on The Ordinary Lactic Acid and slather on some CeraVe. Sometimes I’ll throw in The Inkey List Tranexamic Acid, too — but only if I’m up for it!
Daily Total: $18.16
8 a.m. — Wake up and make my pour-over coffee. I used to buy coffee every day and budget $100 a month for it, but during the pandemic I started making my own, and I haven’t looked back. I mainly bought coffee to break up my commute, but now it’s nice to enjoy it at home. I did lose my Starbucks gold status, unfortunately.
1 p.m. — Busy day at work, as usual. I don’t typically eat a formal lunch every day — I usually just fill up for dinner. This approach helps me stay focused, and I avoid the mid-afternoon crash. It’s not that I don’t eat anything, I usually graze on snacks all day. I don’t restrict myself — if I’m hungry, I eat, but it goes up and down significantly and it tends to align with my cycle.
5 p.m. — Therapy time! My therapist moved our sessions online during the pandemic, and I’ve been doing virtual therapy ever since. It’s really helpful for processing my childhood and culture. My therapist is Asian American, which makes our conversations resonate even more. The copay is always autocharged to my account. $20
7 p.m. — Head over to J.’s for dinner. He picked up bowls from a fast-casual place for us. We usually take turns paying for dinner, which keeps things convenient, and we trust that it all evens out.
Daily Total: $20
9 a.m. — Wake up a bit late today and sign on right away. I highly recommend working remotely if you can — the lack of a commute is a game-changer. I listen to fewer podcasts now, but sleeping in feels great.
12 p.m. — Time for a doctor’s appointment — my routine visit with my gynecologist. I take the subway since Boston’s transit is super convenient. The fare is $2.40 but I know I’ll get $2 cashback soon. I arrive at the office and grab a cup of hot chocolate from reception. $2.40
1 p.m. — Check in at the doctor’s office and get my pap smear done pretty quickly. My last one was three years ago with the same provider; before that, I hadn’t had one in eight years. My first pap was so traumatizing that I avoided gynecologists until a health issue in late 2020. This provider is really great — she listens to my concerns and makes me as comfortable as possible. She also strongly recommends I get the HPV vaccine since I didn’t have it as a child, so I decide to get it today. This appointment is preventative but there’s an old copay that I haven’t paid, so I pay at reception. $10
1:30 p.m. — Take the T back — that’s another $2.40 with a $2 cashback for reimbursement. $2.40
2 p.m. — Stop by Dunkin’ to use my $7 monthly credit from my American Express Gold card. I get a medium unsweetened iced tea and some hash browns. The hash browns are smaller and less crispy than I expected — definitely prefer McDonald’s for those. This is my lunch/snack. $6.20
6 p.m. — Browse Sephora, adding a bunch of products to my cart. I’m preparing for the sale next week. I don’t spend much day to day, but I tend to splurge during big sales. With Black Friday and Cyber Monday coming up, I’m consciously trying to spend less now so I can buy more later.
7:30 p.m. — J. picks up Shake Shack for us, and we use a coupon for a free burger each. We eat out a lot but we make sure to maximize our cashback and coupon use. We don’t eat out every day either. I would say we cook about every other week.
Daily Total: $21
8 a.m. — Wake up a little early today and get to enjoy some quiet moments with my coffee before diving into the chaos. Nothing like that first sip to kick off the day!
10 a.m. — The workday is moving along smoothly but I have a few one-to-ones with my team members. We discuss their current projects and brainstorm potential future ones. I’m feeling a bit less engaged than usual — maybe it’s the gloomy weather — but I’m hoping I’m still providing the support they need. Gotta remind myself that some days are just like this!
1 p.m. — Time for an all-hands meeting. I tune in to catch the latest news from the company. With all the recent outages, it’s mostly an engineer reassuring us that it won’t happen again. I really hope that’s true; these issues could seriously impact our stock price and our profitability and I’m not ready for that stress.
7 p.m. — J. and I finally wrap up our work and head to Chipotle for dinner. It’s one of my go-to spots because it’s healthy (depending on what you get) but still super filling. I order a steak salad. Honestly, I could eat Chipotle every day and not get tired of it. I pay for both our bowls. $26.53
9 p.m. — Jump into the shower and decide to do an Olaplex treatment. It takes a while, but my hair definitely needs the love. I used to be productive during this time, pinning my hair up and running errands, but now I just chill in the bathroom, scrolling through my phone. It’s a nice way to unwind after a long day, even if I feel a bit guilty for not being more productive.
Daily Total: $26.53
9 a.m. — I’ve been awake for a little while but I’m feeling a lot of anxiety about work, so I just stay in bed. With all the news about layoffs lately, I can’t shake this feeling of instability. I know I’m good at what I do, but I’ve been away from the technical details for a bit and feel super rusty. Just trying to breathe through it.
11 a.m. — I start browsing a friend’s registry for her baby shower this weekend. I decide on some cute baby rompers for her little bundle of joy. I find a coupon online, which saves me $29. Honestly, baby clothes are pricier than I expected — who knew? I buy three rompers and pay with my credit card. $81
1 p.m. — I snag obstructed view seats to & Juliet for next Saturday with J. The tickets have been flying off the shelves, and these were the only ones left. I’m excited! Can’t wait for a fun night out. $125.26
5 p.m. — I sign off work. I’m feeling a little down about potential layoffs and decide to make myself some frozen food from my freezer.
Daily Total: $206.26
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