One of my holiday-season secrets is that I like the time between holidays as much as the celebration days themselves. It dates back to my schooldays, when I’d savor that particular stretch of winter break between Christmas and New Years that felt endless no matter how short the days were. The extended-family obligations on the big holidays (in my case, Christmas Eve and Christmas Day) were over, the gift-giving stress had passed. From Dec. 26 to Dec. 30, there were no demands on my time, so I passed it doing exactly what I wanted — reading, binging movies, catching up with old friends, gorging on cookies, rotting in bed. Anything was allowed during that delightful deadzone between holidays.
Things are a bit different now that I’m an Actual Adult™. I still savor these days, but they’re not so simple anymore; there are work obligations to get to, travel schedules to manage, and different family-and-friend dynamics to navigate. There’s still a nice break from work and quality time with family, but this week, while still deserving of its spot in the most wonderful time of the year, isn’t the essence of relaxation it once was for me, and I know a lot of people can relate.
Whether you’re a fan of this mid-holiday lull or are looking to get it over with ASAP, this post-Christmas, pre-New Year’s week can bring up all kinds of feelings. But we’re still in the holidays, so how do we make the most of this weird week? SheKnows tapped the professionals to find out, so grab a cookie (I’ve got two) and read on.
Let’s talk about the holiday lull
“The week between Christmas and New Years can be both a delight and a challenge,” psychotherapist Beth Charbonneau tells SheKnows. If you have some time off, there’s the “pleasure of not having to adhere to the usual schedules of work and activities,” with plenty of opportunities for “unscheduled leisure and play” for kids and adults — something we don’t get enough of in everyday life.
But the level of relaxation you experience during this time “can vary for folks based on personal circumstances, work commitments, and relational dynamics,” therapist Eden Katz tells SheKnows. Those of us spending time with family might experience conflicts or tension, especially after a miserable presidential election. The lack of schedule can also leave kids out of whack, “just when parents are spending lots more time with them,” Charbonneau adds.
Work-wise, you might feel the need to catch up after taking time off, start worrying about end-of-year deadlines, or experience the “anticipatory anxiety of a busy start to the new year,” Katz says. If you traveled, there’s the stress about getting back home after the holidays. And of course, many of us deal with post-holiday depression once the season starts winding down.
On top of all that, you might be feeling anxious because you’re not working or busy actively celebrating the holidays, Dr. David Rosmarin, associate professor at Harvard Medical School and author of Thriving With Anxiety, tells SheKnows. Many people feel out of control when they’re not working, he explains. “There is less structure, less to do, more time to think, and in the quietude of non-work, anxious thoughts can crop up and be upsetting,” he explained.
Making the holiday lull a mental health break
So how can you make the most of this time, and hopefully use it (as my young, carefree self once did) as a true break from the busy-ness of the holiday season?
Set realistic expectations. Resist the urge to fill up all your free time this week with home projects, and don’t feel pressured to “cram a year’s worth of family memories into that one week,” Charbonneau says. Instead, aim for balance, with some time that’s planned out and some that isn’t, some time with loved ones and some time by yourself. If you know you struggle with mental health during this week, or this time of year in general, factor that in too. “We need to expect to feel anxious and stressed this time of year,” Rosmarin explains. “Once we’ve accepted that fact, we can try to use our anxiety or discomfort in a positive and constructive way.”
Be gentle with yourself and your loved ones. “Show some kindness and understanding that not everyone is at their best every minute for a whole week,” Charbonneau says. And while you’re balancing the needs of your kids or older family members, “make sure to put yourself on the priority list as well,” she adds. “Your needs and wants matter too.”
If you’re working, expect (and embrace) a bit of novelty. If you’re working during this period, you can expect that this week might be a little different from others. If you work in retail, maybe it’s busier than usual as customers grab after-Christmas sales; if you’re in an office, it may be quieter than usual if co-workers are taking time off. Either way, keep in mind that this change is temporary. “Try to enjoy what is good about the novelty and be patient with the challenges that will calm down again after the new year begins,” Charbonneau says.
Work through lingering emotions from the holidays. The holidays can bring up a lot, so if you have some down time, allow yourself to process those feelings. “Work through and grieve any lingering holiday emotions” by journaling, talking with loved ones, or speaking with a therapist, therapist Heidi McBain tells SheKnows.
Reset before New Year. “The period between Christmas and New Year offers a unique opportunity for mental health reflection,” therapist Linda Girimonte-Thompson tells SheKnows. Try leaning into that naturally introspective or goal-setting mindset as the new year approaches. “Reflect on personal growth, learn from both successes and setbacks, and use this transitional phase to position oneself for a more fulfilling and balanced future,” Girimonte-Thompson says.
Embrace the slowness. Self-care, reflection, and intentional activities that bring you joy: a combination of those elements will truly help you to take advantage of this lovely holiday lull, Katz says. “Spend quality time with loved ones, engaging in conversations and activities that strengthen your connections,” they explain. If you’re the kind of person who’s always on the go, challenge yourself to “embrace slowness and savor the present moment,” Katz adds. Even if it’s something as simple as enjoying a cup of tea or a short walk around the block, “there are great benefits to keeping everything moving at a leisurely pace.”
This week, for all its weird slowness and lack of routine, is the perfect opportunity to lean into that slowness and allow yourself to fully disconnect. Yes, we promise it’s possible — and this is a beautiful time to do it.
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This article was originally published on sheknows.com.